There was once a man who had it all. Good wife, many children and riches. He was a man that praised God for all that he had and spent time just worshipping his Creator.
Satan decided that he could get this man to fall and curse his creator. But God knew this man’s heart, so he allowed Satan to rip everything from him including his health.
Even his friends begged him to turn his back on this vengeful God because he didn’t deserve his punishments, but He refused.
Day after day he continued to go to God in not just prayer but worship. WORSHIP!!! (I don’t know about you, but worshipping would have been hard.
Finally God spoke in love and reminded him that he was His creation and gave him back more than he had ever had.
I speak from a hurting heart right now and one that is struggling to make sense of the pain placed in my soul.
“I waited patiently for The Lord, he turned to me and heard my cry, Psalm 40:1
I’ve learned that I’ve tried to be so tough and hold onto everything I got. I’ve tried to be good enough. Strong enough, but he is putting me in my place where he hears my cries and holds my tears against his heart, but he’s waiting for me to get to the point of holding onto nothing and still be willing to worship. Metaphorically….I am not losing my amazing man of god, glorious children or our residence. Just losing the walls and fortress I built to not need the strength of God when I could handle it all.
To let go of my anger, my grudges, my guilt, my feelings of entitlement….letting go of everything until like a child I am holding nothing but his hand. Where I whisper “my heart needs nothing but you.” And he whispers back as I’m enveloped in a hug of grace that says “oh, my child…you are my creation and I had faith that you would come back to me all along. I have never failed you and will not now.”
This was me after separating from my first husband. I literally hit rock bottom. I lost everything I had worked so hard to accumulate. All I had was my cat, my car, and the baby in my belly. I was at the mercy of the Lord and the world around me. I was completely broken, and then, by God’s grace, I began to heal. It took time, but like Job, I was restored to a place even better than I had ever envisioned. I now know that there’s a difference between being saved and being surrendered. I was saved at 10 years old, but I wasn’t surrendered until going to the darkest, ugliest place I have ever been – a place I never, ever want to return to!
I’ve typed, and cleared, several comments. Can’t seem to find the right words today. Know that you are much loved!