It happened again This time on another blog, but it is no less frustrating than when it is person.
Somebody compared divorce to death of a spouse. We (widows) have heard this before in a dozen different ways. A certain person even remarked to me that at least I didn’t have to go through the messy divorce and custody issues.
For those who can’t seem to discern between death and divorce, here are some sample comparisons (feel free to add your own in the comments)
Divorce: Going through your shared closet and pulling out all of his suits for him to pick up to take to his place.
Death: Going through your shared closet and pulling out a suit to bury him in.
Divorce: Your kids ask when they can go see the other parent and you respond “next weekend.”
Death: Your kids ask when they can see the other parent again and you say “never.”
Divorce: Your child support is running a little bit behind and you have to call your lawyer.
Death: The SSI that you and your children receive isn’t enough to make ends meet and you have to get anther job.
Divorce: Your ex calls to tell you that he is remarrying and is happy with life.
Death: You go to your spouse’s tombstone to tell them about your life.
Divorce: When you fill out your kid’s school registration you can put the name and address of the other parent, as well as a contact number in case of emergency.
Death: In the lines for the other parent, you have to write “Not Applicable.”
Divorce: As you watch your ex go through life you hope that the thing that split you up has changed each of you to live productive happy lives from here on out.
Death: You can only hope that you have a happy productive life for yourself, because your spouse is dead.
Divorce: loss of a shared dream
Death: loss of a person.
….and frankly….there is no comparison.
Categories: Diary entry June