God’s Imagination And Baboon Butts

One thing I have learned is that God has an amazing imagination.

Examples: Zebra, Giraffe and the Baboon with its funny nose and big red butt.

The biggest times that God’s humor is revealed is when we think we have a plan. We plot and scheme like evil geniuses to come up with reasonable outcomes to our problems or quests. We cackle at our own intelligence and rub our hands together in glee. Superbly satisfied by our mental superiority because we are masters of our destiny. After all…of course WE know what is best for us.

God sits back in His big command chair at Mission Control and observes our actions. Knowing the bigger plan He utters a “tsk-tsk” and punches a big red button. All of our human plans go up in a big mushroom cloud of divine intervention while we stand wide eyed scratching our big red butts like the baboon.

“Holy cow, everything I have planned has been leveled…whatever will I do?”

God delivers a big ole’ belly laugh and opens up the plan book and begins to smirk as He shows us His big imagination.

Human Plan #1: You had a plan for how to get a raise at your job? *BIG RED BUTTON* You get laid off and the only job available is 1500 miles away.

Human Plan #2: You had a plan for remodeling your kitchen? *BIG RED BUTTON* Your water pipes explode. Your house is flooded and there is a gold fish swimming across the living room.

Human Plan #3: You had a plan for a big party to get attention from influential people? *BIG RED BUTTON* A tornado blows through your ice sculptor event and your dog saves the governor’s daughter. His fuzzy slobber face is posted nationally and your name is all but forgotten.

“Checkmate. Next move is yours, tiny human.”

So your sit down on your baboon butt and plan your next move.

Here is where faith based imagination comes in. For every case of God Imagination He has a reason and a plan.

Zebra with its crazy, stylish wardrobe of alternating stripes? Yeah…that’s camouflage for predators.

Giraffe with its rubber band stretched neck and black/blue tongues? Yeah…that’s for reaching the tops of trees and the color of the tongue prevents it from being sunburnt when its out of the mouth.

Baboon with its crazy nose and big red butt? The big nose and red bums are actual sexual attractants for getting the ladies. Also the posterior is created that way to accommodate sitting for long periods of time without irritation.

Plans and purpose to what seems crazy funny to us mortals.

So the next time God shows His wild imagination by annihilating the plans that you have schemed, just picture a baboon butt and have a little faith that there is a plan bigger than your own imagination.

Now about those Human Plans we talked about?

Divine Imagination Answer #1: You accept the long distance job and within a few years work your way to upper management making more than you could have dreamed.

Divine Imagination Answer #2: In ripping up your water logged flooring you discover a chest containing rare documents and you show up at the Antique Roadshow. You sell the item to Christy’s and retire to a beach house with no worries except sunscreen.

Divine Imagination Answer #3: Someone taped the heroic rescue performed by Mr. Fleabags and it hits YouTube going viral and being showed on all the major networks. You make enough to sneer at your influences peeps and book a spa every day for the rest of your life for you and Sir FurFace.

So maybe those are extreme examples of Divine Imagination Answers, but really…you are dealing with The One who designed a giraffe tongue so it wouldn’t suffer an unsightly sunburn during treetop dining. What do you think He has prepared so carefully for you if He has covered those kind of bases?



Categories: Uncategorized

4 replies

  1. Ha, love this! I’ve always said that God has a twisted sense of humour šŸ˜‰

  2. So, when I feel the need to call my husband a baboon butt I’m actually complementing him? šŸ˜‰
    Seriously, God’s divine plan is absolutely amazing. I look at where you’ve been, where I’ve been, and where we both are now. Totally different places from the beginning, but still broken hearted, scared, hurt, and now we are on the side of healing. We will never have it easy, we’ll always have struggles, but we have God and HIS divine plan, so much better than our own plans!! There are no coincidences with God, HE has it all planned out. What a relief to know that I can just hand it all over to Him and know He’s got it under control, I just need to walk along, smile, nod, and say, “It’s God.”

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