Sorry. I Didn’t Understand.

Automated phone services were not created for the stay at home mom with young children running around. The following is a re-creation of this morning’s phone call to take care of some bank stuff.

Bank: Welcome to XXXXXX Our office is closed right now. Please listen to the following selections to use our automat….

My house: Child runs in room saying “Moooooooommmmm”

Bank: Sorry. I didn’t understand your selection. Welcome to XXXXXX. Our office is closed right now. Please listen to the following selections to use our automated system. If you know the extension of the party you wou….

My house: Dog barks in background

Bank: Sorry. I didn’t understand your selection. Welcome to XXXXXX. Our office is…

My house: I whisper hush to children and point to the phone.

Bank: Sorry. I didn’t understand….

My house: I growl in frustration of the sensitivity of this automated system.

Bank: Sorry. I didn’t understand your selection. Welcome to XXXXXX. Our office is closed right now. Please listen to the following selections to use our automated syst…

My house: I say “Operator” into the phone at the same time the toddler cries.

Bank: Transferring you to the loan department. Press * at any time to return to the main menu.

My house: Almost laugh at the sound of crying transferring me to the loan department and push *.

Bank: Welcome to XXXXXX. Our office is closed right now. Please listen to the following selections to use our…

My house: Screams “Operator” over the sound of a kid dropping a dish.

Bank: Sorry. I didn’t understand your selection. Welcome to XXXXXX. Our office is closed right now. Please listen to the following selections to use our auto…

My house: Hits “O” over and over in hopes I can override the system.

Bank: Now transferring you to an attendant.

My house: Fist pumps the air and congratulates myself for this small victory.

Bank: All our representatives are currently helping other customers or our office is closed. Please call back during normal business hours or if you need further assistance you can use our automated attendant.

My house: “UUUUUGGGGGHHHHHH”

Bank: Now transferring you to (insert man’s voice) Robert Brown (name changed to protect the dude)

My house: I hang on in hopes Mr. Brown can just get me to the right person. My cell phone rings beside me.

Bank: You have chosen to end this call. Thank you for using XXXXXX and have a nice day.

My house: *long suffering sigh*



Categories: Uncategorized

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7 replies

  1. how’d you hear the phone call that I made this morning so many states away?!

    • You too, huh? According to Lance we just have to walk into another room. *shrug* Is getting away from kids actually an option or do we have to hit *?

  2. My wife loves online/phone service banking, cable company etc. Of course when she’s on the phone she’ll walk into the bedroom or outside and shut herself off from everyone. I’m not that smart, I do what you do and struggle with the phone calls.

  3. I have to make calls that use these automated systems all the time at work. But on the bright side, at least I know all the lingo needed to reach the operator/attendent/translator/head dweeb.

  4. Yes Ma’am. I have experienced this same phenomenon. Such a lovely experience. Mine was paying electric on voice automated system. It gave me two tried (overtaken by screaming child then barking dog) then “I’m sorry you are experiencing difficulty, please call back when you have your payment ready.” End call. Grrrrrrr. It would have been funny if on a movie. Real life…um not laughing. (Gives serious mommy look).

  5. I have that problem even without the kids and dogs! Automated systems don’t like me or something!

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