School Daze

Dear Dan,

Today I went and registered Annie for kindergarten. This whole suicide thing and what you are missing out on…YOU SUCK! I got to the point where I had to fill out mother and father information. I wanted to sob like a baby as I just marked a big “X” through the father section. Too bad you weren’t there to make your own “X” since this was your choice anyways.

OK…deep breath. (I’m ok..I’m ok…I’m ok)

Wait a minute…one more time for my sake….YOU SUCK!

Alright, moving on.

The big girls tell everyone that we encounter from the grocery store to the random stranger in the parking lot that their daddy is dead.

*awkward moment where crickets chirp*

They are coming to terms with it so I just let it fly.

Yesterday some of my wonderful friends took the children for a while and showed them a good time so I could take care of some of your loose ends, let me play and sleep by myself. I had the most wonderful time and almost laughed non-stop. I went swimming (Yes..I finally bought a bathing suit) and even went to a fair, where I spun my brains out until I wanted to puke.  The best part…I had fun. All the times I begged to go to the fair and you told me it was just a waste of money…every family outing I wanted to do…waste of money….etc.

Guess what big boy…I’m doing it. It’s not a waste of time. It’s a perfect way to spend time in this life. LIVING LIFE. Holding onto every smile, every laugh and every memory. At the end of my life I am going to be look back and proclaim that my life was not wasted. Not one single moment. I’m going to raise our girls to not waste a moment on all this petty junk that gets people down. They are going to LIVE LIFE.

Over and out for now. I’m sure there will be more tonight.



Categories: Uncategorized

6 replies

  1. I LOVE THIS!!!! You go to the fair, girl, and you spin until you can’t stand anymore. That is exactly what life is all about. Be happy. Keep it up – we are rooting for you!

  2. I love it, and I love you girls! I am so proud of you for living life even through the sucky parts. I have every confidence that you are going to get through this just fine.

  3. Spin on, Alycia! You’re right … some things are worth the price even if there is nothing concrete to show for it tomorrow!

  4. Absolutely. Live your life, no regrets. I’m glad you got to have some fun, and some time to yourself. It’s absolutely essential.

  5. I love that you are living your life to the fullest! (And that you are brave enough to put on that swim suit ’cause Lord knows I’m not!) One of these days I have got to meet you IRL. Don’t take this the wrong way, but just I love you. 😉

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