Some background on me. I used to work in a professional portrait studio. I spent hours taking pictures of kids. I was good at what I did and my customers adored my work. I was no Anne Geddes…but not half bad. (I actually take better pictures of the side of a barn) Well, except for that one lady.
If you hadn’t beat your child half to death before taking the picture, then I might have gotten a good shot. Did you really think the look of terror, snotty nose and red-rimmed eyes was gonna be a fireplace mantle type shot? Me no thinkey so, Cruella.
The strangest thing has happened, I can’t take a decent…half way acceptable…mildly artistic picture of my children to save my life. OK so I don’t have the fancy studio, backgrounds and props…or that camera worth about 9K…but seriously, I have the education and the hours under my belt. I could take any child and get “THAT” shot. The one the parents just had to buy the $400 package of.
I have done everything I can think of to get “THAT” shot of The 3 Scribblers. If I actually get them posed (but not posed…casual…ya know) then someone has a snot runner, has to take off their shirt, drops the baby (well…it almost happened) has to poop right. now. or. else, my ISO settings get a case of the gremlins, my light source burns out, the backdrop (the sheet) falls on someone’s head causing absolute terror…the possibilities are endless (and exhausting…and I am running out of M&Ms)
Almost everyday I have pulled out the camera and tripod since Bitsy’s birth.
Everyday I have failed.
The children noticeably get the shakes every time I plead “Say Cheese”
I get a twitch every time I download 300 pictures of elbows moving, tears, eyes blinking, the baby looks like she is being strangled, someone has their arms crossed in defiance.
But a light shines down from heaven and angels begin to rejoice. HOPE is born. Today I was just walking through the living room and the two oldest Scribblers were playing nicely in front of the fireplace. Their clothes (wrinkled with bits of grilled cheese) almost matched. I snatched the baby and the camera. I placed the baby in the 2 year old’s arms, ran the appropriate distance away, hollered out a good Cajun type pig call (this always makes them laugh) and snapped the picture. The ISO is not good, the brightness is all wrong, the colors were horrible, the camera flash was bad…but there are two Scribblers smiling and the baby is not being strangled (you can’t really see her face, so trust me…she is adorable)
My precious Scribblers…yeah, I can live with that.