Mommy says: Quit opening the fridge door and put the coke can back.
Child interprets: There was only a slight edge in her voice and her hands are full with the baby…I can probably open it 6 more times and drink that can of coke before she can actually get to me.
Mommy says: Please stop kicking your sister.
Child interprets: Get one final doozy of a kick in before I call it quits…let’s see if I can actually knock her off the couch with this last one.
Mommy says: Eat every single green bean on your plate or you are not getting any cookies.
Child interprets: She sounded almost serious, but she has folded before and only made me eat 3. I think I will hold out for a better offer.
Mommy says: Hold still and let me get this band in your hair before I pull your hair out.
Child interprets: HA HA…she is weak! Bet she can’t hit a moving target…na na na boo boo.
Mommy says: Don’t ask me for one more thing or we will leave the store right now.
Child interprets: I can see those 3 cans of Folgers and pack of tampons…there is no way she is leaving that behind. If I lick this banana she will have to buy it.
Mommy says: That is so disgusting, please use a tissue the next time you sneeze.
Child interprets: She thinks that is bad…wait until she sees me string it at least 3 feet.
Mommy says: Don’t make me come in there…
Child interprets: I am totally calling her bluff here.
Mommy says: Turn off that TV and go to bed.
Child interprets: Blah Blah Blah Blah!